If I were a boy...

Hi everyone!


Sorry I haven't been able to write as much as I wanted to, but this is too important to not share!

Preliminary
So, I have this new Jeep Renegade since December. It had trouble with the software somewhere in February, nothing too weird, garage fixed it quite fast. A few weeks back I got a letter that they've detected a software issue in all the new Renegade models, so there was an update available that I had to get done. So far, so good. I made the appointment and last Tuesday they did the update. When I drove back home (it's about 30 km), the Start/stop system didn't work. On Wednesday it still didn't work, so I called them. They told me that it could happen that it took a few DAYS to get settled. I didn't really believe it, but okay. Since Thursday and Friday were national holiday, I couldn't call them back before this morning. I drove about 500 km in those 5 days, so normally at least once the start/stop should've worked, but nothing. This morning I called, they say there might be a problem. 'Oh really??' was my first thought. The guy who does the software stuff was only going to be there until 4... I work from 7:45AM until 4:20PM normally, so I had to take half a day off to go there. It's an hour drive from my work to there, so...

If I were a boy
I got there at 3, so in time. I explained the problem again, told them I'd already called twice.
First question these guys ask me: was the system activated? I mean SERIOUSLY????? I don't think you'd have asked me that if I were a guy! Second: did you change air conditioning settings? No and again, if I were a boy, you wouldn't dare asking me that question. Third: were your lights on? I always have them on the automatic, so not the whole time. And really? It doesn't work when the lights are on??? If I were a boy, I don't think I would've been nice still.
Then they tried it. 'No, it's not working'   Well, you don't say...

Humiliation
I don't think I've ever been so humiliated in my entire life. Just because I'm a woman, they thought they could just fix it in 5 minutes, because they thought it was probably something I didn't do right. Both with grins on their faces, that,if I were a boy, I would've punched right off! Steam was coming out of my ears by then. I know they don't know me, but by everything I explained to them I had already tried, they should've known that I know a little more about cars than the average girl. Not that I think any woman should be treated this way, because they were just plane rude. Instead of just trying to fix it, they laughed and told me to come back next week... Sure, I have nothing else to do. I don't have job to pay for rent and food!

Feminism
I don't think of myself as a feminist, because I think it's an ugly word, but maybe it's still not what it's supposed to be in this world: equality. We're all born the same way: our moms give birth to us. No one comes in to this world differently. Wether you're a boy or a girl, you are born that way and no other. You are unique, but we are all the same; we're the same species, we're all equal. It shouldn't matter in the way we treat others, if it is a boy or a girl. It doesn't to me anyway, but apparently to some it still does. I know in the world of garage men, they ought to be tough and cool and stuff, but still they should treat their customer right. No one would've appreciated the way they talked to me with their idiotic grins on their faces.

I hope one day, probably in a faraway future, we will all be able to get along without any exception in race, culture, colour, sex, religion, ... The world would be a better place. People can dream, can't they?

Beyoncé -  If I were a boy (on YouTube)

Little victories

Hi guys,

Sorry it's been so long since I've written something here, but now I have a good reason to do so.
You all know that I have this thing called trigeminal neuralgia and that I've been on medication for that for a little over 2 years now. Well, since December I've been pain free (first little victory) and that means I can start reducing the medication (second little victory)! I started reducing last week Sunday, Feb. 23rd. A few days later my left ear started to hurt again. The nerve is situated a little underneath the ear, so I thought I was going to have fits again. Yesterday I gathered up all my courage and went to my GP. I told him I was hoping to have otitis and yes, he confirmed me it is otitis (little victory number 3). I seriously have never been happier with otitis. Okay, it hurts a bit and with the drops it feels like my head is under water the whole time, but hey, that nothing compared to the pain of the trigeminal neuralgia fits!!! I feel like I could take on the world right now! :)
Now my GP made a whole 'reducing plan' for the next few months and I sure hope that will work out! Since I'll be in Sicily from March 26th until September 30th it will be quite the challenge to keep the reducing plan working, but I have faith in it and I have to believe it'll go well. Please keep your fingers crossed!

Randy Houser - Top of the world (from YouTube)

 

A thing or two about bullying

Dear readers,

Recently I have discovered how bad bullying can affect someone's life. Well, I have never been bullied, so I have absolutely no idea what it feels like. And honestly, I have something very obvious that people can make fun of. I have a birthmark shaped as a cross on my forehead. Something more obvious is yet to be found, I think. Anyway, just saying, I don't know what it must be like.
My brother has been bullied for almost his whole life for a nasal voice... I don't think he has a funny voice and neither does anyone in the family. So now I'm actually writing this blog for him.
I think bullies are the one's with weaker personalities, they have to find something in someone else to make them feel alive, to prove a point. Isn't that sad? Isn't that the saddest thing you've ever heard? Having a strange, weird, funny, whatever voice, haircut, nose, ear, arm, leg, whatever, is not so sad as having a very weak personality.
Now, I have a quite strong personality, I think and I'm not going to lie, when I was just a little kid I have let me in with the bullies. I never bullied anyone myself, but I did walk along with those who did. For which I'm very very sorry and I know that was weak. When I grew up I understood that bullying really hurts the bullied.
My borther, now 22, is still wearing the scars of what was once told him. It's been almost 4 years now since he graduated. In high school the bullying got so bad that he had to leave school and study from home. It hurt him so bad that he even thought of comitting suicide. I knew back them that he had have these thoughts. I thought now he had moved on from the bullying, but apparently it leaves scars that never really heal. The slightest little spark can bring this feeling back. It hurts me very much that there's nothing I can really do, except from trying to talk to him. What I want to do is kick all those bullies in the guts, but that's not allowed. I'd wish I could go back to middle school and teach those guys a lesson. Let's face it, that's what big sisters are for, but apparently it never dawned on me back then. I'd wish I could learn my brother to be more proud of himself for what he is and not what he might sound like, because who cares??? My borther is a tall, handsome, very sweet guy and he deserves so much more than feeling miserable for what someone once told him and lingered. I'd wish I had some kind of magical power to make him see himself the way we do. Now he only sees what those guys way back then told him and that's not right. I'd wish I could give him some of my self confidence. I have more than enough, maybe even too much.
My brother, if you're reading this, I'm writing it all down, because I think that's the only way you might want to listen to me. Please don't do anything I wouldn't do. Please take a close look in the mirror and see yourself as a handsome young man full of life with the world ahead. I'm right there with you and I hope that you know that if you ever need me, I'll be there.

Bullying will never be banned out of this cruel world, but maybe everyone who reads this can start to make the world just that little bit better.

Thanks for reading.

 

Rehab

Hi guys,

Sorry it took me so long to write something here. I've been back in Belgium for a couple of weeks now and I'm still 'in rehab'. For one reason or another it's more difficult than I thought it would be. For instance I find the traffic here very very very busy in comparison to the traffic in Kos. Okay, in Greece people drive like mad men, but here it's soooo crowded. I feel like I never have enough space and I'm always in the way. It takes me a long time to get used to that again, but anyways now I can drive a 'real' car again, my lovely Jeep Wrangler.
Enough about traffic and cars, let's talk about real life. It takes a while to get used to the rhythm of home again. It still hurts that my wonderful dog, Viggo, isn't around anymore. Somehow I still one him to walk trough the door and all is back to normal. Especially the first 2-3 days it was very hard. Now it's getting easier, but I just keep thinking that I needed to be there for him when he wasn't feeling well... It came as a shock when I was still in Greece, but the shock was twice as hard when I got home, as I also thought it would be. Anyway, I'm still grieving and things will get better, but it will never be like it was before... I realize that now.
When I was in Greece I was working 6/7 and almost 10h a day. Now I'm back to doing absolutely nothing. Which is fun for a while, but it gets boring really easily. In December that will change, because I got offered a job at FLIR, so my old job. I'm going back there to replace my dear colleague who's responsible for Germany. So yes, I'll have to speak some German out there! ;) Good thing I have some time now to practice my German skills a little bit. I'm really excited and looking forward to it.
December 4, I will finally know where I'm headed next summer season. So I will work with FLIR until I have to leave for my next Thomas Cook destination. That's another thing I'm looking forward to!!! I so hope I can go to Italy!! Pray for me! ;)
After that next summer destination I will have to chose what to do with my life. I'm pretty sure I won't stay in Belgium. I have to, no, need to explore the rest of the world. The world is too big to stay just in one spot. I have a 'travel-bug' (most likely inherited that from my mum) and that bug needs some loving. ;) No, seriously, I have to look for a job somewhere around the globe and I'm pretty sure I'm going to find it. All it takes is some courage and a suitcase.
Don't get me wrong here, I would still miss my mum, brother, family and friends like crazy, but there are so many things to help us keep in touch and, come on, planes aren't invented to stay on the ground. :) I will definitely keep you posted on my whereabouts on time and in the meantime you can find me in Belgium.

To close of this blog I would like to share a song that really made me think about the decisions I have to make next year. My 'shoebox' is a large, beautiful white basket and all my memories are in there. Enjoy this beautiful song by Chris Young:

Lyrics: 

I stumbled on a bunch of junk of mine
In a shoebox the other night
In between cleaning up files and messes
That I'd made of my life

Ticket stubs, poems and old letters
I dumped them all out on the bed
Found a homemade birthday card from mom
And this is what it said, yeah, this is what it said

Don't forget the little moments
They're the ones that mean the most
When the way home seems so far away
Take 'em out and hold them close

And take a picture with your father
'Cause one day he'll be gone
And don't forget to fill an old shoebox
Full of things to look back on, full of things to look back on

I opened up my grandpa's pocket knife
And I was back to his back porch
It was summertime I was turnin' nine
He said, "You want that knife? It's yours"

I remember runnin' off in the yard
Carved my name in every tree
I haven't held it since he passed away
And it meant the world to me
Because he meant the world to me

Don't forget the little moments
They're the ones that mean the most
When the way home seems so far away
Take 'em out and hold them close
And take a picture with your father
'Cause one day he'll be gone
And don't forget to fill an old shoebox
Full of things to look back on

Look back on, a little window to the past
Look back on, God knows life goes by so fast
If ever you should ever doubt the blessings that you've had

Don't forget the little moments
They're the ones that mean the most
When the way home seems so far away
Take 'em out and hold them close

And take a picture with your father
'Cause one day he'll be gone
And don't forget to fill an old shoebox
Full of things to look back on

I stumbled on a bunch of junk of mine
In a shoebox the other night

Source: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/chrisyoung/theshoebox.html

The Wonder of You

Today I received some terrible news. My beloved dog Viggo had passed away last night. I cannot believe it. He was the most joyful boy. I have no words to describe how much I love him and now I will never get to see him again. It's hard when you're at home when this happens, but it's even harder to be so far away. I haven't had the chance to tell him how much I love him. I'm finding it really hard to believe this really happened and that it's not some kind of bad dream I'm not waking up from. I haven't had the chance to say a proper goodbye. I find some consolation in the fact that I saw just a glimpse of his face on skype last week, but it doesn't make the pain any less. I'm having a hard time now, here in Kos, but I guess I'm only going to realize he's not there anymore when I get home.

My dear boy, wherever you are, I hope you know how much I love you even while I wasn't there to comfort you when you sighed your last breath. I hope that my other two loved ones, Pasha and Dzilla, will help you find your way across the rainbow bridge and that they will guide you through heaven. Because I'm sure that's where you are looking down on me and helping me find a way to place this. Believe me when I say I have never had a better friend than you were. I missed you so damn much out here in Kos and I was so looking forward to seeing you at the airport when I got home in one of the next weeks. Now I'm only missing you even more and now I know I will never have the chance to hold you in my arms again.

I hope they serve pasta in dog heaven, because I know you love that so much. Eat lots and lots of it and do it out of a golden scale, because that's only what you deserve. You are still my golden boy and you will be forever. I love you.
When I was sick you were there to give me some consolation, you wouldn't go one step away from me to make sure I was alright. When one of the girls or the cat was sick, you would do anything to be close to them to help them through. That is the wonder of you.
I love you, Viggo, forever and ever. You have my blessing to go over the rainbow bridge and rest in peace. I love you, I will never ever forget you. The wonder of you will always be in my heart. 

I love you, my best friend. Big kiss! 

I think this song describes exactly how I feel about my boy. 

"When no one else can understand me
When everything I do is wrong
You give me hope and consolation
You give me strength to carry on
and you're always there to lend a hand
in everything I do
That's the wonder, the wonder of you

And when you smile the world is brighter
You touch my hand and I am a king
Your love to me is worth a fortune
Your love for me is everything
I guess, I'll never know the reason why
You love as you do
'cause, that's the wonder, the wonder of you

I guess, I'll never know the reason why
You love me as you do
'Cause that's the wonder, the wonder of you" - Elvis Presley, The wonder of you.

A teardrop and a smile

Dear readers,

I have an announcement to make. Most of you will already have heard about it, but still...
I quit my job at FLIR to go work for Thomas Cook.

Teardrop

Last Friday was my last day at FLIR, I had a wonderful time over there and I learnt a lot. I had the most wonderful colleagues for whom I'm very thankful. I tried to hold my tears, but I couldn't, I did shed a teardrop. On the way home: lots... :s Made me doubt wether I was doing the right thing...
Now I believe I did do the right thing. I will definitely miss working at FLIR and of course I will miss my colleagues! Thanks to all virtual technology we will definitely keep in touch.

Smile

Now on to the new job: I will be a Thomas Cook-representative in Kos, Greece. I will fly out on Saturday, 8th and I will only come back to, by then probably, freezing Belgium in October/November.
I'm really excited about all this and I'm really grateful for this opportunity. SMILE!
I will of course keep you up-to-date about my whereabouts. ;)

For now I want to end with this quote and lovely song: "To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe." - Anatole France (via brainyquotes.com)

Mariah Carey ft. Whitney Houston - When you believe (via YouTube)

"There can be miracles
When you believe (When you believe)
Though hope is frail
It's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles
You can achieve (You can achieve)
When you believe
Somehow you will
You will when you believe" 

(via songteksten.nl)

You're the one that I want

We all know it, we all sing along with it, we all want to sing it to that one person...
Don't we? ;)

Now, for me the one that I want makes me wait a little long to sing it to him, but okay, that's only fair, I just have to wait for him to cross my path. ;)
I'm used to waiting...
But what if you truly love someone with all you have, don't you just want to go out and tell everyone about him/her? Even a total stranger? It's what love can do. It's that strong!

Unfortunately lately I hear a lot of sad messages about break-ups, divorces, leaving a pregnant girl all by herself... That's something I will never understand. In my group of friends we're all pretty strong in what we believe in, we believe in love, in making up, in having a fight and then kiss and make up. Not just break-up over every single thing and have an on/off-relationship...
What I actually want to say is that this song, You're the one that I want, leaves us this message. You're not the one that I want and leave you as soon as things get though. You're the one that I want and the one I want to fight for. That's what we all should keep in mind. It's too easy to cash out once it gets a little bit more complicated.

Fight for love, people, it's the most important thing! :)